Talking back

Two posts ago, I introduced the concept of writing a purge. Rachel, a writer, was resisting finishing her novel because of fear of failure. So I had her purge the thoughts in her head about writing, to see how her fear manifests itself.

Today, I'm going to go into the purge in more detail. The idea behind the purge is this: as long as we keep something safely hidden inside our heads, away from the light of day, it can live as true for us. For example, I remember that I once thought my friend Lynn was upset at me. I would see her, and gather more evidence for the theory that she was cross: that she said "hi" and not "hi, how are you doing?", that she didn't tell me that her sister was in town, etc. I gathered a nice pile of evidence, and it lived as truth to me. Then I spoke to a mutual friend, Arthur, who seemed perplexed by my conclusions. When he asked me why I though Lynn was upset at me, and I spoke my list out loud, I realized that it didn't hold water. There were dozens of other explanations for each piece of evidence, and there was no jury on earth that was going to side with me on my conviction.

By getting the thoughts out of my head, I was able to see all of the holes in my reasoning.

This is why we do purges at the Handel Group, to see the bugaboos that live in our heads for what they really are. By writing down all of the thoughts in your head, as if you have a tiny microphone in there recording everything, you can hold your thoughts up to the light and see the holes. And then you can talk-back to the thoughts, just as Arthur talked back to my thoughts about Lynn.

To demonstrate, I would like to share with you an example from my client Leo. Leo is an established actor, and is looking to expand his craft to include screenwriting as well. He had a good idea for a script, had taken a screenwriting class, but he was resisting writing the script itself. Here is his purge:

"It’s a great idea but unfortunately that’s all it is: an idea. I lack the necessary writing skills to bring this project to reality. I can’t do dialogue at all. Writing a script would be way over my head. I should just stick to what I do best which is premises.

I just don’t have the kind of brain for plot twists and catchy dialogue. There are people out there for whom writing comes easy. The fact that it is hard for me is a sign that I should just leave it to the pros.

I don’t even know where to begin. The fact that I don’t know where to begin is a sign that I shouldn’t. Writers know where to begin. They have a technique to this stuff. I don’t have the base of knowledge necessary to undertake something this large. It would be a hot mess. It’s just better to devote that amount of time to something else.

Maybe I could do it, but I couldn’t do it well so I’d rather just not do it at all."

As long as these thoughts lived in his head, they were his truth. But once he put them on paper, the holes in his reasoning became apparent. Here is his talk-back:

"It’s a great idea but unfortunately that’s all it is: an idea. Of course it’s just an idea. All projects, large and small, start out as an idea in someone’s head. The difference is that they followed through on theirs.

I lack the necessary writing skills to bring this project to reality. How is it possible to know that when I haven’t even tried it yet?

I can’t do dialogue at all. Ridiculous. Being an actor gives me a well trained ear for not only scene structure but the rhythm of good dialogue.

Writing a script would be way over my head. I should just stick to what I do best which is premises. There’s no reason why this should be way over my head. People much less talented and qualified than me finish script all the time. It is entirely possible for me to do so.

I just don’t have the kind of brain for plot twists and catchy dialogue. There are people out there for whom writing comes easy. The fact that it is hard for me is a sign that I should just leave it to the pros. NOT TRUE. The vast majority of working writers speak of being lost for long periods of time on projects. My idea of an easy birthing process is a myth. It’s wishing to have the end result without the work, pure and simple.

I don’t even know where to begin. The fact that I don’t know where to begin is a sign that I shouldn’t. Writers know where to begin. They have a technique to this stuff. I know exactly where to begin. I could finish plotting my outline where I left off in class. My old class notes that I’ve kept would give me a huge leg up towards getting some work done, and the steps necessary to do that.

I don’t have the base of knowledge necessary to undertake something this large. It would be a hot mess. It’s just better to devote that amount of time to something else. Chicken! This is an excuse. I would love to work on a project like this and it’s a logical next step in my career. This is fear of failure. The truth is I have EXACTLY the base of knowledge necessary to complete a project like this. I’m an actor with an intrinsic instinct for structure, dialogue and building drama. All I have to do is channel this existing talent into this new project. It should be fairly simple actually.

Maybe I could do it, but I couldn’t do it well so I’d rather just not do it at all. Brat! “I won’t wanna!” I can do this. I know in my heart that I can not only do this well, but knock it out of the ballpark. The only thing that is stopping me is my fear. I don’t like playing games I’m not already the best at. But if I put my mind to it I could write a first draft of this script easily in my free time.

So you see, most of the thoughts in Leo's head were not entirely believable when he put them on paper. He was using those thoughts as an excuse to not take on the scary proposition of writing his script. With the excuses stripped away, he can move forward to work on his script, and gather some real data from the experience about what it's like to write a screenplay, how much he enjoys it, and what his ideal role in the movie production process is.