The here and now

Continuing with the theme of scheduling stresses, I realized recently that I spend a lot of time being somewhere else. While playing fetch with the dog, I think about all of the other things I want to accomplish before 8:00am, and will I have the time? While eating breakfast, I check my email and plan out my communications for the day. While talking to my partner Anthony, I wonder what we will make for dinner. While eating dinner, I plan out the wedding shower card I'm going to make for my buddy Sandra. And on and on.

The consequence of my rambling mind is that I don't experience the joy of the current moment. The cute about-face my dog does while diving for that toy to avoid a collision with the wall, the yumminess of the food I'm eating, and the beautiful depth of Anthony. The irony of it all is that the goal of my scheduling is to accomplish and experience as much as I can, but then when my efforts reach fruition, I don't take the time to actually experience the moment. My mind is off on the next thing. Even though I live a jam-packed life, at the end of the day I feel unfulfilled. My first response to this feeling is to say "well then, I guess I need to schedule more activities into my day, then." But in reality I have plenty of quantity, but not much quality.

My solution to this has come from meditation. I meditate for 2 minutes before doing something that I want to enjoy. During those two minutes, I close my eyes and focus my attention on my breathing. In and out, in and out. The focus brings me to the current moment, and then when I open my eyes and move on to the event itself, I am more present to what is happening now. And when the elsewhere thoughts pop into my head, I am more able to say "Not now" instead of indulging them.

Today, Anthony and I head off to Costa Rica for a vacation and the wedding of two friends, Jason and Hillary. I might blog while on vacation, I might not. But one thing is for sure: there will be many two-minute meditations :).